Many here including myself are open about our battles with various mental illnesses. I’ve suffered from PTSD for most of my life, I’m also a veteran, as well as having suffered more than 1 TBI.
I just recently started a new grow. The first in several months, had to stop due to family issues. I had no clue how much not growing was having a negative affect on my mental health.
This morning I was in my grow room saying good morning to the ladys and listening to music like I typically do. Between songs I overheard my daughter telling my wife that she was glad I was growing again, I’m a happier person when i grow.
At first I was taken aback by such a statement by my daughter. So after I was done I asked the wife about it. What she said I was not expecting.
She told me in the past 2 years, growing has improved my mental health more than any medication, therapy, treatment since we’ve be together. She said that she can see the difference just in my anxiety and how often it hits. In how much I smile and how I smile. Many times has she said that cannabis saved our marriage, today she told me growing has saved me from myself.
To say this hit HARD would be an understatement. I had no clue, not even an inkling. Have I noticed a difference, yeah I guess, kinda. But not like she was describing. At first I thought Growing just makes me happy, gives me a living thing to focus on, makes me feel like I’m more in control of my medication, and therefore my illness.
But it’s more than just that, it’s more like mana feeding me. Like a part of me was missing, and growing is that part. Somehow growing a wonderfully complex yet simple plant, is healing that part of me, that I didnt know was broken.