Mental illness and growing. A personal note

Many here including myself are open about our battles with various mental illnesses. I’ve suffered from PTSD for most of my life, I’m also a veteran, as well as having suffered more than 1 TBI.

I just recently started a new grow. The first in several months, had to stop due to family issues. I had no clue how much not growing was having a negative affect on my mental health.

This morning I was in my grow room saying good morning to the ladys and listening to music like I typically do. Between songs I overheard my daughter telling my wife that she was glad I was growing again, I’m a happier person when i grow.

At first I was taken aback by such a statement by my daughter. So after I was done I asked the wife about it. What she said I was not expecting.

She told me in the past 2 years, growing has improved my mental health more than any medication, therapy, treatment since we’ve be together. She said that she can see the difference just in my anxiety and how often it hits. In how much I smile and how I smile. Many times has she said that cannabis saved our marriage, today she told me growing has saved me from myself.

To say this hit HARD would be an understatement. I had no clue, not even an inkling. Have I noticed a difference, yeah I guess, kinda. But not like she was describing. At first I thought Growing just makes me happy, gives me a living thing to focus on, makes me feel like I’m more in control of my medication, and therefore my illness.

But it’s more than just that, it’s more like mana feeding me. Like a part of me was missing, and growing is that part. Somehow growing a wonderfully complex yet simple plant, is healing that part of me, that I didnt know was broken.


@Rye I feel it man. It’s definitely a catharsis. I like having something I can focus on that’s just mine that I can control. I also like knowing that my end result is going to help me and others. Makes me feel like I’m doing more with my life sometimes other than being stuck in a monotonous routine working my life away with little to show for it. It’s also pretty rewarding to watch something grow as you nurture it and to be able to see in real time how your work is paying off. I also hate being in the city and suburbs being stuck inside all the time. It makes me stir crazy and sends my anxiety through the roof. I was practically raised outdoors and I don’t feel quite like myself if I’m not in nature. It gives me my own little forest to get away to and let my troubles melt away. Not to mention it’s great aroma therapy when they go into flower. The terpenes can have an effect without smoking it. Just breathing it in as they start off gassing during lights on can calm you or lift your spirits. Sometimes I even get “high” on it when I grow a cultivar that has a strong lemon and berry scent. I feel more relaxed and have more energy after spending about 20 minutes in the tent with them. I also love growing cultivars with a woody or pine scent because it can almost feel like I’m in the forest and not in a tent in a shed under artificial lights.


“Medicine for the Soul”


it is absolutely great therapy that we all feel no matter our backgrounds & state of looking forward to it being legal to grow here for even more stress relief.


Well said @Rye keeps use sane my friends

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Man @Rye , so cool!!

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Ditto brother. My gardening is how I feed my soul. As coined by my son when he was 3, “IT FEELS ME BETTER”. We have taken this comment forward and used it for the past 6 years (as he is now 9). Simple words, simple actions, phenomenal results.
It is the little stuff Bob, the little stuff
I helped Kmac who is enduring a fall from GRACE at this time in her life. We have all been there and I did not want to leave her out there all alone…that would have been an indignity and a dark spot on my soul…
Al lwe can do is help each other, without judgement, rebuke or retribution…
Guess that is why I like belonging to THIS COMMUNITY
Savor the day, it is a choice. Make the best of it…it’s a choice. Could be the last thing we chose
Blessed be all


Love your kind words @Mrb53004 happy growing my friend

Well said. I so much feel your words that I actually got a lil bit misty eyed as I read this. Thanks for sharing it.

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Gardening in all forms, skilled woodworking, carving, wheel thrown pottery, playing instruments, all are popular gentlemanly pursuits over the ages.


To all, I want to say that growing and this kind community has really helped me.
Last summer I was held against my will and tortured, 2 weeks after a shoulder replacement surgery. You all and therapy has helped me more than anything. You have helped me not to be so wary and afraid. You have been kind and at the right time even teasing. Mike, Mr53004 is right it’s the little stuff. You have helped me “grow” in different ways. I love each one of you.


Keep on growing Brother !


Hits home brother mental health is hard shit can’t put it in words the thoughts the thoughts the thoughts they don’t stop .damn dude I can really relate I have my shit to still trying to escape can’t get away from it even though it’s gone But yet still here .growing has became a big escape for me it gives me something nothing else can a sense of accomplishment,individuality,gratification, mental health needs to be addressed more wish there was group meetings like Alcoholics anonymous or narcotics anonymous but for mental illness wish you well brother.


**+++Thank you for sharing, sometimes one is so busy, one doesn’t see themselves. I too have issues, being older with a disability, and a veteran, I feel like Mr. Magoo sometimes, when I’m in the zone. We have a huge garden, complete with weed eater, rototiller and ride mower. This is our second year learning how to be farmers, big strawberry patch, blackberries, blueberries, planted close to 20 fruit trees this year. Feel like saying “Welcome to the Dig”, coffee plants are going in soil tomorrow. Need more holes for the 2 pear trees and 2 mandarin orange trees that just arrived. Good dirt is key as we import topsoil, another load coming tomorrow which is amended with Happy Frog for starters. When I look back just 2 years I have to pinch myself to see if I’m dreaming things are going so well. Gardening is my Zen time, growing herb is my hobby, learning volumes this year in both areas. Thanks again for sharing something positive, in that, dealing with our disabilities is key and to me that is where the different strains of herb come in to play. Learning how to cure correctly insures a smooth smoke and I can’t say enough about Kyles input. Think I grew some of that “Make a note of where you live” stuff he was talking about. It’s doing great with pain issues and focus, I shun narcotics so I’m happy with the results I’m getting. See you next time.